What’s the difference between 1 and 3?


 What’s the difference between 1 and 3?



By Vanessa Beddoe-Sandstrom

Ever wondered what it’s like to have three children? Read on to find out.
 
1. Pregnancy:
 
First kid
You buy every recommended pregnancy book. At any given day you know the precise length, look and developmental stage of the baby. Each page is read, reread and underlined, ensuring you know what to panic about at every stage. 
 
Third kid
What’s a book? 
 
First kid
You purchase every possible necessity for baby by 20 weeks.
 
Third kid
You’ve given away all your baby gear because you weren’t planning on a third. Figure you can survive with a couple of baby-grows and a sling anyway.
 
First kid
You know precisely what sleep and feeding schedule you intend to follow once the baby is born and whose side you’re on in the Gina Ford Vs Attachment Parenting wars. 
 
Third kid
There is no time for scheduling. Baby must fit in with the lives of two other children who have a built-in ability to wake up the baby as soon as her eyes finally close. You have no idea how much your child sleeps, you only know that it’s not enough. 
 
2. The Baby
 
First kid
You change the baby’s nappy before every feed and know exactly how many nappy changes your baby has a day. A fascination/worry develops over the rainbow of colours discovered in these nappies. 
 
Third kid
Baby is only changed for stinkers. While still a source of mystery, the rainbow of colours no longer result in a call to Healthline.
 
First kid
Every dot, bump, sneeze, cough and dribble is a source of anxiety and trip to the doctors. You panic if a child with a cold so much as looks at your baby.
 
Third kid
Your baby is constantly covered in drool. From other children. You know what Sixth Disease is and can spot a chicken pock at 30 paces. 
 
First kid
You know exactly what baby should be doing developmentally and have purchased every product on the market to speed things up. You come home from coffee-group and worry because your baby hasn’t clapped yet. 
 
Third kid
Your baby plays with a Tupperware container and spatula. You worry that you’re putting baby on her tummy too much because you don’t want her to crawl yet (or course number 3 will do everything much earlier).
 
First kid
You feel the day has been a success if you’re out of pajamas by noon. You do not know what exactly what it is you do all day, you only know that you are constantly doing it. You go ballistic if your partner is one minute late from work. 
 
Third kid
You take the three kids on a four-hour drive to your parents for a few days during school holidays. On your own. You go ballistic if your partner is one minute late from work (some things do not change).
 

2 comments

   

Kellie Elder-Morunga on 08 March 2013 14:53
Very cute, had a good laugh. Pretty spot on for our house, and I'm only on #2 feel a little bad for #3 already.


   

Chua Siew Siew on 08 March 2013 11:27
Somewhat stereotypical but did give me a chuckle or two.. ;)


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